How Much Housework Should Your Children Be Doing?
Apr 8, 2008 Diane Laney Fitzpatrick
Should your children be helping more around the house? The answer is probably 'yes.' The issue of kids and chores has many solutions and one is right for your family.
You don't want to overwhelm your children with too much work, but you don't want them to be lazy and helpless either. Somewhere, there's a middle ground with kids and chores, in which the children pitch in, and learn some life skills and something about teamwork.
Most parents want their children to learn the value of pulling their own weight and participating in family life through teamwork and sharing, said Linda K. Waite, co-director of the Center on Parents, Children and Work, in a FamilyEducation.com article.
Housework is a part of life. No matter what kind of lives your children grow up to have, they’ll have to take care of their surroundings to some degree. By the time kids go off to college, they should know how to do laundry properly (including getting out some common stains), change sheets on a bed, clean a bathroom, run a vacuum, mop a floor, fix some simple meals, and wash dishes.
Kids can handle housework better than you might think. By 8-years-old, most kids can handle all but a few jobs round the house. Parents can teach their kids basic household maintenance skills early and get the whole family to pitch in.
Dinner Chores
Most families have children helping to set the table, make dinner, clear the table or wash the dishes. As busy as kids are these days with homework, sports and extra-curricular activities, parents are sometimes tempted to send the kids away from the dinner table and handle clean-up themselves.
It's worth it to come up with a system for getting some help before and after dinner. Rotate specific jobs and have everyone pitch in, following the rule, "No one leaves the kitchen until it's cleaned up!" Or assign a child per day, or even a child per week, with options for switching and trading for busy homework and activity nights.
Laundry Chores
It seems there are as many different laundry chore charts as there are families. Some parents get so fed up with kids not putting their dirty clothes into the hamper, not emptying their pockets of gum and papers, and not putting their own clothes away, that they throw up their hands and declare, “Every man for himself!” Depending on the size of your family, that could mean dozens of small loads of laundry being run all day and night.
If you are handling all the family’s laundry, don’t hesitate to ask your kids to bring their dirty laundry down to the washer and put it into the correct pile. Put clean clothes into individual bins or baskets and make your children be responsible for putting away their own laundry and returning the bin to the laundry room.
Setting a Family Chore Plan
Don’t assign household tasks to your children in moments of anger and frustration. When you are facing a messy house, can’t find yesterday’s mail and have no clean underwear in your drawers, any job assignments you give your family are likely to be unrealistic. Instead wait until you’re calm and can look at your weekly schedule with a clear mind.
Make a list of the household chores that need to be done and think about how much each of your children can do and should do before coming up with a plan that suits your family. Whether it's a list, a chart or another plan, assign age appropriate chores to your family members and make them responsible for them.
The Family Job Jar
Write individual household chores on small slips of paper, fold them and place them in a large jar or fishbowl. Each family member takes a slip of paper and does whatever chore is listed. The job jar method works well for families who want to get all the house cleaning, yard work, and other jobs done all in one day.
Linking Chores to Allowance
Tying your children’s allowances to the household chores they do should be done with care. On one hand, money is a powerful incentive for kids. Some families put dollar amounts on certain chores: Kids earn a little bit for making their beds and make more for mowing the lawn and bigger projects. However, kids eventually figure out they can lay off chores if they don’t need the money right then. You may find yourself negotiating your child’s pay, when you should be teaching them that household chores should be done just because they’re members of the family.
Most parents want their children to learn the value of pulling their own weight and participating in family life through teamwork and sharing, said Linda K. Waite, co-director of the Center on Parents, Children and Work, in a FamilyEducation.com article.
Housework is a part of life. No matter what kind of lives your children grow up to have, they’ll have to take care of their surroundings to some degree. By the time kids go off to college, they should know how to do laundry properly (including getting out some common stains), change sheets on a bed, clean a bathroom, run a vacuum, mop a floor, fix some simple meals, and wash dishes.
Kids can handle housework better than you might think. By 8-years-old, most kids can handle all but a few jobs round the house. Parents can teach their kids basic household maintenance skills early and get the whole family to pitch in.
Dinner Chores
Most families have children helping to set the table, make dinner, clear the table or wash the dishes. As busy as kids are these days with homework, sports and extra-curricular activities, parents are sometimes tempted to send the kids away from the dinner table and handle clean-up themselves.
It's worth it to come up with a system for getting some help before and after dinner. Rotate specific jobs and have everyone pitch in, following the rule, "No one leaves the kitchen until it's cleaned up!" Or assign a child per day, or even a child per week, with options for switching and trading for busy homework and activity nights.
Laundry Chores
It seems there are as many different laundry chore charts as there are families. Some parents get so fed up with kids not putting their dirty clothes into the hamper, not emptying their pockets of gum and papers, and not putting their own clothes away, that they throw up their hands and declare, “Every man for himself!” Depending on the size of your family, that could mean dozens of small loads of laundry being run all day and night.
If you are handling all the family’s laundry, don’t hesitate to ask your kids to bring their dirty laundry down to the washer and put it into the correct pile. Put clean clothes into individual bins or baskets and make your children be responsible for putting away their own laundry and returning the bin to the laundry room.
Setting a Family Chore Plan
Don’t assign household tasks to your children in moments of anger and frustration. When you are facing a messy house, can’t find yesterday’s mail and have no clean underwear in your drawers, any job assignments you give your family are likely to be unrealistic. Instead wait until you’re calm and can look at your weekly schedule with a clear mind.
Make a list of the household chores that need to be done and think about how much each of your children can do and should do before coming up with a plan that suits your family. Whether it's a list, a chart or another plan, assign age appropriate chores to your family members and make them responsible for them.
The Family Job Jar
Write individual household chores on small slips of paper, fold them and place them in a large jar or fishbowl. Each family member takes a slip of paper and does whatever chore is listed. The job jar method works well for families who want to get all the house cleaning, yard work, and other jobs done all in one day.
Linking Chores to Allowance
Tying your children’s allowances to the household chores they do should be done with care. On one hand, money is a powerful incentive for kids. Some families put dollar amounts on certain chores: Kids earn a little bit for making their beds and make more for mowing the lawn and bigger projects. However, kids eventually figure out they can lay off chores if they don’t need the money right then. You may find yourself negotiating your child’s pay, when you should be teaching them that household chores should be done just because they’re members of the family.
Copyright Diane Laney Fitzpatrick. Contact the author to obtain permission for republication.
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